"Why People Accused Me of Using My Manhood For Rituals" - Femo Lancaster

For Femo Lancaster, whose wife delivered their first child recently after nine years of marriage, those years of waiting came with more than enough trauma.

Apart from the fact that fake prophets cashed in on the situation, a rumour shook Ibadan where Lancaster, born as Femi Fadipe is based that the musician used his manhood for rituals in exchange for fame and wealth. It was alleged that his mentor, Yinka Ayefele that took him to the spiritualist that did the exchange, hence his wife’s inability to have a child.

In this interview with The Anchor’s WOLE ADEJUMO, Lancaster spoke on the manhood issue, the grueling years of waiting as well as his closeness with Yinka Ayefele and how he feels being a father after nine years of marriage.

How do you feel having to wait till after nine years of marriage to have a child?

Firstly, I will say glory be to the Holy name of the Lord, the Almighty, the I am that I am, the King of Kings. I won’t lie to you my dear brother, it wasn’t so easy. It was a painful experience but we thank God, at the end of the day, the Lord made our joy bountiful.

You would have received different types of advice in those 9 years; different ideas would have come to your mind. Ordinarily, some people would decide to try elsewhere after 3 or 4 years without a child. Did you get that type of idea?

Sure. It’s even uncountable. Even my mum once advised me to probably have a child outside from maybe three different women and it would just look as if I had a set of triplets, but I decided not to. Even along the line, she once helped me look for a wife. She brought the picture to me that this is the woman she wants me to marry. She said I should please marry the girl for the sake of having a child.

So, how were you able to deal with the situation?

I prayed for God’s wisdom during the challenge. I know my mum wanted the best for me. She wanted me to be a father and I bless the name of the Lord today that what she wanted for me eventually came to pass.

I am a person that believes so much in one man, one woman and like my bible says that it shall be one fold and one shepherd. I don’t like wives; I like a wife, just one wife. My father married only my mother and they had four children. I like the legacy he left behind. He’s gone now but the legacy he left behind is what I appreciate and I pray to be able to do better than he did while he was alive.

And based on the kind of job I do, most people believe that we musicians do have wives; like they say in Yoruba, obinrin kan o kun cupboard (one woman is never enough). But I want to be a good role model for upcoming musicians and for our fans out there to see and realize that you can actually be in this field without having wives.

You can manage your situation by the grace of God and with the help of the Holy Spirit and I believe in putting God first in everything I lay my hands on because I so much believe that outside God, I can never be anything. But with God, I will always be on top. I will always shine and I will forever remain what God wants me to be.

There were allegations that you used your manhood for rituals to be rich and famous. I don’t know if you heard them.

Yeah

What comes to your mind when you hear such?

The first time I heard it, I went to one of my uncles and I told him everything. He said “you don’t always expect good comments or positive criticism”. He said I should always expect both the positive and the negative. I then said but Uncle, in this kind of situation whereby people are accusing me of using my manhood for fame, how do I defend myself? He said even the mad man walking on the streets, people still talk about him. He said let me tell you the truth, if nobody talks about you, see yourself as nobody. So, his advice was what I worked on most of the time.

But each time I hear the allegation, I feel bad. Sometimes I cry inside because it’s only God that sees my heart. How many people will I go and tell that what they said is not true? I just kept managing every negative news till the Lord favoured me and answered my prayers.

You know they also said Ayefele used his legs and spinal cord for the fame he is gaining and because of our closeness, my loyalty to him, my regard and respect for him, they said he also took Lancaster along to where he got fame and that is the main reason two of them are so close and are making waves in the music industry, especially in Ibadan.

And if you go round town, there are lots of artistes in Ibadan, people talk about Lancaster and Ayefele a lot. If Ayefele had actually done that, this baby wouldn’t have come. He didn’t take me anywhere. God prospered my life and favoured me greatly. It is not that I am the best musician in town. Sometimes I sit down and flash back. I question myself that what’s the big deal about my songs? I am just God’s favourite. So, that’s it.

For years now, you and Ayefele have been like brothers. What brought about the closeness?

It even goes beyond being brothers. I see him as a father figure. I try to study him; I try to detect his dos and don’ts. The way I was brought up, even if someone is older than you are by just one day, the person deserves some respect. We’ve been enjoying a wonderfully cordial relationship. So, that makes the journey so smooth between me and Asiwaju Olayinka Ayefele.

Most musicians find it difficult to bow. They want to rise in a day, forgetting that Rome wasn’t built in a day. And that is the reason behind the song “okiki gradually ni mo fe” (I want my fame to be gradual). I don’t need to be as popular as Michael Jackson before I can be okay. In my little way, God is always with me. What I have been able to achieve today is by His grace. I don’t need to attack Ayefele to be okay, neither do I need to disrespect or disregard him. I am okay and I am contented in the Lord.

Though I am aspiring for greater glory but the one I am endowed with, I am always full of praises and thanks to God Almighty, Jah Jehovah. So, we have a cordial relationship. I have never seen him as a rival and I don’t see myself as a competitor in this industry.

I am a player and I am doing my things in my own way and till I retire or quit the game, there can never be any controversy between me and Ayefele or other musicians and even the upcoming ones. There are some that tried but I never allowed it to work. I ignored and kept quiet because I am a learned person. If I allowed it, I would be the most stupid person on earth.

Close allies like you who are very good friends would be disappointed seeing me do that kind of a thing. I always consider some respected people like Ayefele, Bayo Adeleke Banik, Yemi Sonde and my pastor, Pastor Orisaleye and of course, Wole Adejumo who I call the Olubadan, David Ajiboye, Dare Adeniran and others. These are people that I always check myself out with. If these people should hear this kind of thing about me, how would they feel? I don’t want them a and my fans to be disappointed.

How were you able to manage the home front in those 9 years? How did you manage to keep your wife calm and comforted?

It wasn’t so easy; I won’t lie to you but thank God for her and I thank God for my life too. God has been the one sustaining the marriage and the two of us played major roles too. No matter what you tell my wife, she will is going to call me and tell me, no matter what I hear outside too about my wife, I do call her and tell her.

There were some people that came to tell her that look, it is better you leave this guy because he can’t produce, he cannot impregnate you. They advised her to move out that she will see that her prayers will be answered. Anytime she hears such, she would call me, “Honey, can you just imagine what so and so person just said about you?”

Are you saying people you knew closely were the ones doing that?

It is just because my Pastor said I shouldn’t mention names and I won’t want their names to go on air, but these are people I can tell you their names. The best man on my wedding day was one of those people and these are the people that will come and say Lancaster, please I am in need of this or I am in need of that  and I always try to meet their demands in my own little way. So, what really sustained the marriage like I said is God Almighty and my wife as well, because of her faithfulness.  Even fake pastors came along the line. Yes, fake pastors. Some accused my mum of being responsible for her barrenness, some said I was the one, some said my wife, some mentioned my mother in-law, some sai my father in-law, and my God doesn’t gamble. My God will be factual and direct with you.

So, it has been God and the oneness between my wife and I in the journey so far. And we thank God that He crowned our efforts at the end of the day. It wasn’t so easy. It is an experience I don’t wish for my worst enemy, especially when you know that there is nothing wrong with you. My medical report from day one shows that there is nothing wrong with me.

There was even a time one of the Doctors we went to, accused my wife that “Madam, you should have given birth to twins or triplets, with the level of your husband’s results”. That was when I finally refused to go for IVF. And when I refused to drop N 1.2 million for IVF, God answered our prayers.

You nearly opted for IVF, went to pastors, to what extent did you really go?

Not that I really did much but you see friends would come to me and say Femi please lets to to so and so pastor. He’s a man of God; he’s a man the anointing of God is flowing in his life. If he prays for you, I am very sure the Lord will answer your prayer through him. It got to a point I refused to go to any pastor.

In one of the churches I went to, the prophet there said there was something I needed to do. He said I should bring some money, he would pray on the money and return it to me that I should give 10% of it out to beggars and spend the rest on anything I like. At first I was reluctant to release the money but when he kept telling us that we were the ones causing delay, I gave it a second thought. It looked plain enough; at least he didn’t say he wanted my money. But when I gave him the money to pray on, a week passed, two weeks and after that he would see me and say “ah, Bro Femi, I have not forgotten you o.”

After a while, he came and said “Bro. Femi, I’m sorry o. I will soon finish the prayers. But what happened was that I borrowed part of that money. I will return it and pray on everything, and then I will give it to you so you can go on and give out the 10% as discussed.” I just made up my mind never to go to his church again.

Like I said, I believe the God I serve is everywhere. He is not only in churches. I would be indoors but my wife never stopped going to church. It doesn’t mean I stopped worshipping God but I stopped going to church to avoid all these stupid and fake visions because any church I go, I easily get noticed. The next thing you hear is “Bro. Femi, please wait. The man of God wants to see you after the service.”

And different visions and prophecies were coming. To save my life from fake prophecy, I decided not to worship in any church. If you see me in any church, it is probably on invitation to come and sing for the Lord on a commercial level.

But right now, my faith is renewed in the Lord and things have changed now. We have a testimony. The Lord has put my enemies and critics to shame. I think my duty is to return all the glory to God. That is why I named my son Toluwalase (God has the final say).

When you see the pastor that collected money from you, what comes to your mind?

Truly I still see him. I won’t call him a man of God but a fake prophet that calls himself a man of God. Each time he sees me, probably when driving by, he will just change his direction. And my bible says by their fruits you shall know them. So, I leave him to his conscience and Almighty God to judge.

Can you describe the moment when you were called in at the hospital and you saw your son for the first time?

I loved my wife more because this child renewed our love. I was highly excited; overwhelmed that God has put an end to people just calling me by my name. I will now be called Baba Toluwalase.  I am grateful to God for the fulfillment of His promise in my life.

In one of your albums, you sang years back that the Lord has blessed you with a good child. What prompted that song since you didn’t have a child then?

I believed that one day I would become a father and to give myself the joy that I deserved. It was also to wave my mind away from what people were saying then and of course for the ladies chasing Lancaster around because in this job, if you are not guided by God and the Holy Spirit, it is not easy to practice. I sang that song just to put them away.

I intentionally prophesied positively into my life then, though I was still looking for the fruit of the womb. It was prophesied back in 2009 and it has come to pass. So, I believe it is good to say good things to oneself. You know those who pray for their lives everyday still wait on God for breakthrough not to talk of someone being cursed every day. And God hears prayers, His ear is not heavy and His hand is not short to deliver. He is a wonderful God.